Can I Have Sex With You?

Manish Sharma

An enquiry rather inappropriate, but nevertheless, a very valid one. What if a guy goes up to a girl, or dear girl, you are approached by a guy enquiring, “Umm… You are very attractive. Would you like to have sex?” Well, what often follows is one tight slap… combined with …a “How dare you?” And some expletives, which men are not used to receiving from women most of the time.

I have always wondered, is there a ‘right’ way to approach a girl without offending her? A way that takes into account her consent too. Well, there exists a way called “the art of pataaoofying a girl” and the maestros who proudly introduce themselves as love gurus, claim to know the secret of taking a girl to bed. But sadly they miss out one aspect of my demand, the ethicality.

Well, let’s assess the above scenario. A man with honesty and politeness, eagerly asks for consensual -sex and chataaakkk! The sound of his embarrassment echoes through as her hand lands on his cheek. Batao zara, baat hui koi, rape thodi kar raha thha..?

Well, we definitely know the arguments pouring from the other side of the society, “It is unacceptable! Dude, it’s sexual harassment so better shut up!”

Now, the question is where to draw the extremely thin line between a ‘way’ of approaching and sexual harassment? Because according to the love gurus, men have to keep trying. Women like it. They need it, and they won’t give in unless the man has qualified on their meter of perseverance.  This however completely betrays any logic, as some of my girlfriends have shared, this irritates women beyond anything.

Another thing is women are dignified and hence you have to keep their dignity intact while you deflower them, without them knowing about it. And guess what, they like it…. Have you ever heard the girl saying “switch off the lights” because I don’t want to know what I’m doing? … May be?

An extremely necessary condition for this enquiry of ‘sexual things’ while not offending your prospective partner, is that we respect and acknowledge it as normal, for a woman to ask any man if she can have sex with him as it is for a man. Owowow!!! So should we now hold slut-ism in high regard? That is exactly the point. We the culture vultures of society have tagged sex as vicious, and the natural human desire for it, as obnoxious, especially if it’s the fair sex asking! And we have trapped ourselves in our own beliefs. Is it doing any good?

It’s all about balancing superstitions with rationality, blind faith with reasoning. We have restricted our journey into peace by not laboring to look for truth and rather simply giving in to the authority.

“Change is not difficult. Only they must find it difficult, those who have taken authority as the truth rather than truth as the authority.”                               

-G.Massey, Egyptologist.

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